Flirting: Signs They're Into You

What is flirting?

It's hard to pin down a single, perfect definition of flirting, but chances are you've flirted with someone before! At its core, flirting is a sweet and subtle way of showing someone you're crushing on them. It's a low-stakes way to test the waters and see if the person you're interested in feels the same way.

Depending on the individual and their confidence level, flirting can be totally obvious or nearly impossible to read. You might even find yourself wondering if they talk to everyone that way, which is where the second-guessing creeps in.

That's why learning to spot the subtle cues is so important. If enough of these signs add up, it becomes pretty clear that you're dealing with genuine flirting rather than just friendly banter.

Telltale signs someone is flirting with you

A shift in behavior

If a confident person is into you, they'll often make their interest pretty clear. They'll likely steer the conversation in a fun, playful direction to show they enjoy your company and build a little chemistry between you.

On the flip side, a shy person might be a bundle of nerves around you. That doesn't mean they aren't interested—you just have to look for quieter signals. Shy people tend to overthink things, so if they go out of their way to stand closer to you, brush your hand or shoulder while talking, or simply make an effort to engage, it could be their way of flirting. Sometimes, because they struggle to voice their feelings, they'll rely heavily on eye contact to let you know they're romantically interested.

Fishing to see if you're single

If someone makes a point of letting you know they're single and smoothly steers the conversation toward your own relationship status, there's a strong chance they're testing the waters. They might also probe for your thoughts on dating and relationships to gauge whether you'd be a good match.

Teasing and playful banter

Some people prefer indirect flirting. Instead of being upfront, they might playfully tease you or hand out compliments in a roundabout way. This is a "safer" approach that people often use just in case the other person isn't on the same page. It's also a great way to spice things up and spark a fun, flirty dynamic between the two of you.

Eye contact

This is arguably the trickiest sign to read. It's totally normal and polite to look someone in the eye, but if they hold your gaze a little longer than usual or keep stealing glances your way, it's a huge giveaway that they're interested.

Extra special attention

It's much easier to spot how attentive someone is when you're hanging out in a group. Ask yourself a few simple questions: Are they mostly looking at you? Do they seem way more focused on what you're saying than anyone else? Do they slow down and wait for you when the rest of the group walks ahead?

Finding excuses for physical touch

If someone who isn't normally very tactile suddenly finds reasons to brush past you, it's a strong sign they're flirting. It can be as subtle as brushing against your arm while walking, resting a hand on your forearm when they laugh, or "accidentally" touching your foot under the table.

Why not put these tips to the test?

Now that you've got a better idea of how flirting works, you can put some of these insights into practice to drop a hint to your crush. Just remember—the golden rule of flirting is subtlety. Don't lay it on too thick!